ColorMe Clear

Alright
I'll admit it
I've taken advantage
of a good thing

I've taken my outlet
the real me
the person inside
and trying to turn it into profit

I've become that which I hate
In order to do what I love?

no, that doesn't make sense
though I'll admit
even this is an attempt
but a last attempt at that

perhaps it's a loss of footing
while trying to scale a mountain
I find comfort at where I am
with my foot dug in deep
pushed in over time
I new sort of warmth sets in
and I have found myself again

now I reach out,
into a scary new world
on a new ledge.
new dangers intact

which is fine,
a comfort zone
brings you nothing
but eventual loss

but here is my err
I try to take with it,
the fancied warmth
of the previous ledge

but my fire is non existent
and my nest is beneath me
the bones are foreign
and just plain odd

so for me to
no
I'm still trying
fuck it

fuck poetic
suave and sexy
I'm lost I'll tell you that
and perhaps that's all I have
All I'll ever have to find my self
is the fact that I'll never find myself

so fuck my ideas
my notions of dreaming
I'll be honest and true
go back to my roots
rip up the pages as I write them
on go on forward